Wednesday, February 11, 2004
//Sometimes I don't do what I sayEven when the reason is that I simply can't
This life and loving it's stuff, is cold sometimes
But I think I might be colder
It's like the world's so conservative
And afraid of someone stepping up and being bolder
So as I was walking one day
It became apparently clear
That something in my world is changing
My feelings are starting to resurface
I scrawl them out on pages
Even if no one else is reading
The words fly faster and faster
Similar to how my heart's beating
As it gets closer and closer to the bursting point
I'm not sure which way I should go
I should do what I feel
Coz even that, I know
I don't like to be scared when I do something
But for once, I'm truly afraid
Maybe something I've never felt so strongly
Will actually be the right thing...someday
If not today
Then some other night
When I have the courage to put up this fight
Now as I sit here, writing this
These words are getting harder to approach
I'm getting further away from you
I spent some time outside my realm
I feel like I was on some other world
I wanted to go back to my own place
But that spot's taken forever by a yesterday girl
You've shown me a light
Coz something snapped inside my mind
I don't remember exactly what was said
And my memory doesn't rewind
The light I was used to
Faded at every sight of despair
I used to give up and quit trying
I'd tell you I don't care about the time I spent with you
I began to realize
That I was learning something
Looking through someone else's eyes
Even if the eyes were still my very own
Hell, I still think it could've been a dream
Maybe I shouldn't be holding on so tight
But you're the one who called me a dreamer
You've shown me a light
One strong enough to start a fire
Somewhere in my heart, in my soul
Everything that we did together
I probably won't easily forget
We were juz being ourselves
And I hope that there's nothing to regret
Even with all of my lame jokes
And how much we laughed and teased
You would laugh right along with me and my stupid humor
Every bus and taxi rides, i didnt forget
But you had left me far behind
Memories aren't fading too fast
I couldn't tell you if you were sad
When we said goodbye
But if you weren't, I'm not mad
It's juz the night we spent
When the light shone the brightest
That last night we had was too awesome to be real
I feel like we're criminals and someone should indict us
The light you've shown me
Is juz the light I was missing all along
Even if you never meant it to shine for me
At least, I'm not writng the same old song
Now my emotions are in view
And I'm not sure what to make of it
I'm here but maybe my heart's closer to you
You makes me feel like I'm somewhere I belong
Whatever sealed how I feel now
I can only analyze the facts
After the last time we parted
I thought I caught you staring back
Maybe I thought too much
Maybe you'll kinda miss me
But whatever I think or feel now
It's too real to be imaginary
So real, at least in my eyes
I don't wanna sound too sentimental
But swingsets to me are also something special
I've been taking every memory
And storing them in little jars
Like the time, you leaned over and asked me what I was doing
Now I can destory the doubt
And I can change everything
Inspired by the light you've shown me
Something tells me there's more than juz feelings
And I might not know what the feelings are
Hope, courage and one more
I know I can be so happy and jumping across the clouds
I'm this close to kicking down heaven's door
You've shown me the light
Maybe I'll never know the reason for sure
Feelings are so much to think about
Especially when you're this precious
And I know you'll understand
You're kinda the same way too
But I guess I'm really holding on
And I don't think you'll ever know how much I'm missing you
Now that I'm here
Finally trying to lay my fingers to rest
Further from you now
But close than you know
So, as I take one last look at the stars
There's only one shining brightly in my mind
Feeling like I've never felt before
But knowing that I'm still blind
You might not feel the same way
And I'll admit that this is fine
Coz I'm not sure if it would be better
If there feelings weren't juz mine//
//There you are, standing in front of me
Close enough to touch but you don't know
I feel your eyes looking right through me
Open your heart, maybe there's more to see
So many times, I've tried to get near
Too many times, I turned away without trying
Unspoken, thousands of words running through
My mind, when I think of you but still
Leaving me speechless
Unspoken, the way I still feel about you
Wishing you knew, hoping you will
I can hear your voice wherever I go
Playing like music on a beautiful day
But you've not spoke to me for the longest time
What would you say, if I told you, begging you to stay for a while longer//
//I think people are confused when they say forever
How long will that be if they are together
they measure their love through the amount of time spent
Do they understand that time will come to an end
As soon as the clocks stop, where will they be
Timeless
A word that describes what we had
Timeless
The mark of a never-ending path
Timeless
A concept that I hold so dear
Longer than forever, you'll be in my heart
Bittersweet, the sound to say that love is always
But to put it in better words, true love can't be measure in days
Can time really tell if i love you
What's a year, if nothing's there
Can time really tell I'll always be there
Days may seem much shorter
And a whole minute may feel like an hour
So don't use time to measure what you feel
It doesn't exist, how could it measure what is something so real?//
//I wanna wipe away those bitter tears
And hug you so close
To kill your fears
And to have you wherever my life goes
And over a forever changing time
I wanna kiss your sweet lips
To call you mine
And of your love I longed for a sip
You have so much of me
But still I was pushed away
Our love could never be
There's no way
I'm simply not the one for your heart
I juz caused you to weep
It torn me apart
To hear that lonely bleat
You have chosen some other fellow
Who has something I do not
Something so grand
Something that cannot be bought
All I can be is a great friend
Fate can be so unkind
But I realize
That is the closest we'll ever
At least, there are no lies between us
I don't want you to cry any longer
Even though you've burnt my soul
I'll be there to make you stronger
If not make you whole
It still hurts though
That we're stuck in this make-believe game
The pain continues wherever I go
And the blood flows juz the same
I have scars from you that will never disappear
Like a sixty-billion dollars man
With the soul crying tears
Coming from another land//
//Now that I'm home at last
I can't help but feel so cold
It's like none of this is real
And I'm convinced that I'm not alone
What is it that I feel
When it consumes every thought I have
Does it make me more of a human
Does it teach me how to live
I'm not falling down this time
Making it my best try
And it doesn't matter if someday
I'll still be asking why
Coz I'm not pretending and I'm not lying
When it hurts to think of you somewhere
On your own, all alone, struggling
Sometimes these stars forget
That wishes can't be perfect
And then I'm here, waiting for you
And God knows if it's love yet
Thinking of being back in the past
And if the past is where my heart is
Then I've missed that place since you left
And it's hard to get over this
When you're far away from home
Why do you feel so alone
When I wish I could be there
And tell you to keep holding on
When you're this far away from solace
And you're not sure if you'll make it
The struggle in my heart is on
But it's too far to be up and quit//
//Once again, I'll go to her old place
To a lonely void deck
It's a place that's filled with silence
Yet completely void of love
I don't know where our love went wrong
But it's tearing me apart
She left me here all alone
Holding pieces of my broken heart
Now,I've got a whole lot of nothing going on
Yes,I've had a whole lot of love that has gone wrong
I ain't had no one to hold me for so long
Yes, I've got a whole lot of nothing going on
Almost every Christmas
Since she left me
Has ended the same
I lie awake here in the dark
While my heart cries out her name
And tonight as I climb up
Those dark and lonely stairs
I know that once I've reached her old flat
She won't be opening the door for me anymore//
Posted by Giselle at 2/11/2004 03:40:00 AM
Monday, February 09, 2004
//I can't believe you're really gone nowBut I know it's all the best
And I know that we were right
But I still reach for you each night
In midnight it hurts like hell//
//I talked to you the other day
Looks like you make your escape
You put us behind, no matter how I try
I can't do the same
Let me let go, baby
Let me let go
If this is for the best
Why are you still in my heart
Are you still in my soul
Let me let go//
//I can feel the magic floating in the air
Being with you gets me that way
I watch the sunlight dance across your face and I've
Never been this swept away
I can feel the magic floating in the air
Being with you gets me that way//
Posted by Giselle at 2/09/2004 03:52:00 AM
Sunday, February 08, 2004
hmm..feeling pretty tired today and having muscle aches..and i have absolutely no idea why..
oh well..today supposed to wake up early to meet vainpot and ym to
go dragon boating but i woke up late..
hmm.meet up with ya guys next week alright..
oh yesterday met up with vainpot ym and later dougson and her friends,weilin, ash,karen,fiona and xianyang..heh
was quite fun but tiring cause nothing much to do either..
oh man i cant wait for valentines' day where we can go fullerton and see all the stars..
gonna be a star studded night i guess..heh thats so cools..
totally cant wait..
anyway ecca ya heard abt the incredibly famous william hung? haha he's so damn funny..
he's really crazy man..i mean now he's damn famous than any winners of the american idols..haha anyway he's pretty down to earth guy maybe thats why and he's quite humble and all even though he cant really sing or dance haha
hmm.anyway nothing much to update so shall end now..
oh ym..the quotes in your blog are really cools =) hope to see ya soon..heh
//think i better leave right now, before i falls any deeper//
Posted by Giselle at 2/08/2004 05:54:00 AM
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